Monday, April 25, 2011

I Am Not A Porn Star

I am not a porn star and I never will be. The majority of the women out there are also not and will never be in porn. In society these days it is not uncommon for some men to assume the women that they sleep with and have relationships with are going to act like porn stars. They think they we will do all the things they see on camera, and say the same things and groom the same way. They think porn is real life.

The reality is that porn is fantasy. Not that it’s bad or wrong. It’s not always what happens in real life. And it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. It should not dictate how you make love. I will admit there have been some things I have seen on screen and really wanted to try out and think would be really fun. But never have I expected my partner to want to do it. Everyone has different likes and dislikes. Just because you like something and majority of people also do doesn’t mean the person in your bed agrees.

In no way am I saying don’t mimic anything you see in porn. Like I said before I have seen things I wanted to try out. What I am saying is please never assume I will do everything you see porn girls do. In particular there are a few things I always hear people talking about they don’t want to do, but men assume they will because they see it on camera.

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Please don’t cum on my face. I am seriously not a big fan of it. Mainly more for inconvenience than not really liking it. It is such a pain to clean up if it is all over your face and it messes up your make up. Sometimes you are not always in a situation where you can fix everything up right after. Some girls love having guys cum all over their faces; good for them. It is not my thing. I have only ever let one man cum on my face and that is my current boyfriend and it has only happened once or twice. He knows I am not a fan so he never assumes I will do it.

Thank god bush is making a comeback. Personally for me if I have nothing down there I feel like a child and it makes me uncomfortable. Thankfully also my boyfriend is a big fan of bush. But until recently girls in porn always were completely bare down there. I knew guys who would say they were grossed out by any pubic hair because of what they have seen in the movies. Sure sometimes if there is a full on bush and no grooming what so ever it can be a bit much. But if there is a good sized landing strip and everything else is smooth what is the big deal? Don’t expect the vagina always to be bare when you and it first meet.

Not everyone likes anal. I however do like anal but it is not for everyone. I like to say don’t knock it until you try it but some have tried and they aren’t into it. Don’t force the subject if the other party isn’t down. Going along with that, saliva does not equal lube. Especially for anal! There is really no natural lubrication in the anus so you always need to have lube. I always use lube when playing around back there. I don’t want to hurt myself and tear anything. ALWAYS USE LUBE FOR BUTT SEX! And only do butt sex if the other person agrees.

A few other things; not all girls want to have sex with other girls and have threesomes, not all girls like to be choked and slapped, not all girls love mouth fucking and not all girls cum from only internal stimulation.

But not only do guys always assume things when they watch porn; girls will too. Most guys do not last as long as they do on screen. Trust me, there are a whole of other things going on while on set and it appears they go longer. Trust me I know, my boyfriend does porn and sex at home is so completely different than it is on screen. So ladies don’t assume anything about the men folk either.

In the end I would just like people to realize that everyone is different and wants different things. Please don’t let porn dictate how you are having sex. Sure you can learn new fun tricks and you might find things that you want to try but it is not reality and it is not the only way to do it.


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Thursday, April 21, 2011

Hitachi Magic Wand Review


Way back when I first started my site I talked about the Hitachi Magic wand and how I really wanted one. Well that magical day has finally come and I finally am the proud owner of my own wand. It was a very happy day and when the package came in the mail Brian said his boyfriend duties just got a lot easier. Little did he know I was going to be using it on him too, you know what I mean.

For those of you that live under a rock and don't know what a Hitachi Magic wand is then you are missing out. In the real world it is just a back massager. But those who know better know all the other wonderful things you can do with it. Now don't get me wrong, it makes a fantastic back massager. But since it's debut women have been using this wand as a first rate vibrator.

It plugs into the wall so never have to worry about grabbing batteries or recharging. This thing has some power, and I just don't mean regular power, I mean some crazy strong power. It has two speeds of 6000 and 5000 rpm, yes please! Plus there is even a one year warranty. Hopefully I don't burn this thing out in a year and need to use it. But hey you never know, my vagina is rather demanding.

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I was a little scared to use the wand. Everyone kept telling me it will change my life and I will love it. I was afraid if I used the wand a lot I would get used to the super powerful vibe and not be able to use anything else to get off. On a daily basis I use all sorts of vibrators with different speeds and levels of power but nothing to the extent of the power of the wand. I didn't want to vibrate my clit numb. Now I know that really isn't possible but still!

A lot of people were surprised I didn't already have one. You would think someone who does what I do would have all the important sex toy elements. But I am still building my collection to this day. But I am stoked this wand is now part of the collection.

The first thing that happened when I opened my magic wand was Brian wanted a back massage with it. So we went back and forth using the wand on each others backs. Well it was really more me using it on Brian and then using it on my own back. This happened a few times before it was put to real use.

My first experience with the wand was by myself. Even though there were two speeds I automatically put the wand on the highest speed. The minute it hit my clit I started to feel things. The power was really awesome. The funny thing was how I orgasmed. I figured with something of that power I would orgasm a lot faster than normal. But to my surprise it took me the same amount of time to reach orgasm. The difference in my orgasm was how strong it was. With the wand my clitoral orgasm was much more powerful then it usually is when I use a vibrator. It was pretty sweet.

The next time I used the wand I had some help. I told Brian I would be in the bedroom if he needed me, he always knows what that means. A few minutes after playing with myself he came in with his normal devilish grin he has on his face when he catches me masturbating. In no time his pants were off and his penis was out. I went to put it away but he stopped me and wanted to use it on me.

I had other plans. I decided to use it on him. I took the wand and while I was giving Brian a blowjob I put the wand on his perineum. It was a little strange for me only because the wand is so powerful it was making his penis vibrate as I was sucking on it. Which realistically means I could turn his penis into a vibrating penis to have sex with, must remember for next time.

Brian won't always admit it but he is a fan of me playing around down there. He was a big fan of having the Hitachi down there on his perineum. In his words, "It was pretty rad!" I am going to have to use it on him more often.

In the end I highly recommend the Hitachi magic wand to anyone and everyone. It has stayed plugged in next to my bed since I got it!

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Thursday, April 14, 2011

Sexualized

Sex sells, this is not a surprise to anyone. Not only in terms of selling products but also in terms of selling/branding yourself. Over the past few years I have branded myself as a sex blogger. In many situations sex bloggers will keep themselves private and hidden behind their words, even using fake names. This is to keep their real identity a secret; you never know who might stumble upon your writing. When I started blogging I didn’t really care who knew what I did, I use my real name and it’s always me in my pictures. Throughout the years as I got recognized as a writer I also got sexualized.

This is actually a debate I have had with family members and friends many times since I have started. When I was a little girl I was taught that it is a bad thing to let men sexualize you and only see you as a sexual object. That if men do see you like that they have no respect for you. Even today from people I am told the same thing. I shouldn’t put myself out there as a sex object and I should be ashamed if I do and if I do then I have no respect for myself.

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If some guy or girl wants to look at me as a sex object than I have no problem with that. Sexualize me all you want, I have no one else but myself to blame for it. I am the one that put me out in the world in that manner. I openly talk about my sex life and have done nude modeling. I am all out there for the world to see. One of the reasons I put my physical self out there is because I knew it would broaden my audience of readers, and it has.

I have the utmost respect for myself. Just because I don’t mind if some guy thinks of me as a sex object doesn’t mean I don’t know my self-worth. I take it as a compliment when people praise my sexualness. I have gotten quite a few messages from guys and girls telling me I was their masturbation material for that evening. Someone once told me I should be disgusted when I hear things like that. In reality it makes me smile and giggle. It’s nice to know I have that power with my body. I get letters from women saying they wish they could be as open and out there like I am and that I should be proud of it.

It’s not a bad thing to be sexualized by someone. If someone does it in a manner you personally think is degrading than I agree in that instance it’s not appropriate. But what is degrading and crossing the line for some people might be perfectly fine for someone else. I am simply saying for myself I have no issue with it and if you too have no issue with it then there is nothing wrong with that. Don’t let other people’s beliefs that are different than your own make you feel bad about the decisions you have made.

In the end all I am really saying is don’t feel bad for being portrayed as a sexual being if you yourself see nothing wrong with it. Embrace it and feel proud. Sexualize me all you want, I have no issue with it. I also have no issue using the fact that people sexualize me to further myself and my writing and gain more exposure. When it comes down to it who is going to get more readers, the writer who is anonymous or the writer who is a bit more out there and risqué? In no way am I hurting myself or disrespecting myself, I am just being myself.


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Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Sexual Experiment

I have decided to give myself a little sexual homework assignment. It came to me while I was masturbating one day, it’s when I do my best thinking. Lately when I have been masturbating I like to put on some background music. I can go for quite some time while having me time, so I usually hear quite a few songs in the process. Well I began to notice that even while I had my music on shuffle the same song kept popping up. This for a while didn’t really mean anything to me, until my great idea came to me, and then I came.

A few years ago I read this article that really interested me and I didn't believe it could be true. It was about this girl who gave herself a challenge. She decided she was only going to masturbate to one song and only one song. Just put it on repeat and go to town for as long as she wanted. Now the goal of this challenge was to see if she could train herself to get to a point that just hearing the song would get her all hot and heavy and cause her to orgasm without doing anything. Basically a naughtier version of Pavlov’s theory.

I am not sure how long she conducted this experiment but I know in the end it pretty much worked. I think she was in the car with friends when she heard the song and things started to happen. Which sounds like a pretty awesome experiment if you ask me.

I am still debating on which song I should use as my inspiration. I am thinking it should be an upbeat song one would dance to. Something that when I hear it, it makes me happy, and hopefully will make me super happy if this thing works out. Of course if it does work out I will be doomed every time I hear it no matter where I am.
Guess this means I better get cracking at rubbing one out to only one song. I think if I do it daily I should be on the right track to making it work. I mean I already pretty much do it daily (on top of all the sex) so I might as well add a sound track too it. Maybe I should even play the song when Brian and I are having sex…….

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