Monday, April 25, 2011

I Am Not A Porn Star

I am not a porn star and I never will be. The majority of the women out there are also not and will never be in porn. In society these days it is not uncommon for some men to assume the women that they sleep with and have relationships with are going to act like porn stars. They think they we will do all the things they see on camera, and say the same things and groom the same way. They think porn is real life.

The reality is that porn is fantasy. Not that it’s bad or wrong. It’s not always what happens in real life. And it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. It should not dictate how you make love. I will admit there have been some things I have seen on screen and really wanted to try out and think would be really fun. But never have I expected my partner to want to do it. Everyone has different likes and dislikes. Just because you like something and majority of people also do doesn’t mean the person in your bed agrees.

In no way am I saying don’t mimic anything you see in porn. Like I said before I have seen things I wanted to try out. What I am saying is please never assume I will do everything you see porn girls do. In particular there are a few things I always hear people talking about they don’t want to do, but men assume they will because they see it on camera.

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Please don’t cum on my face. I am seriously not a big fan of it. Mainly more for inconvenience than not really liking it. It is such a pain to clean up if it is all over your face and it messes up your make up. Sometimes you are not always in a situation where you can fix everything up right after. Some girls love having guys cum all over their faces; good for them. It is not my thing. I have only ever let one man cum on my face and that is my current boyfriend and it has only happened once or twice. He knows I am not a fan so he never assumes I will do it.

Thank god bush is making a comeback. Personally for me if I have nothing down there I feel like a child and it makes me uncomfortable. Thankfully also my boyfriend is a big fan of bush. But until recently girls in porn always were completely bare down there. I knew guys who would say they were grossed out by any pubic hair because of what they have seen in the movies. Sure sometimes if there is a full on bush and no grooming what so ever it can be a bit much. But if there is a good sized landing strip and everything else is smooth what is the big deal? Don’t expect the vagina always to be bare when you and it first meet.

Not everyone likes anal. I however do like anal but it is not for everyone. I like to say don’t knock it until you try it but some have tried and they aren’t into it. Don’t force the subject if the other party isn’t down. Going along with that, saliva does not equal lube. Especially for anal! There is really no natural lubrication in the anus so you always need to have lube. I always use lube when playing around back there. I don’t want to hurt myself and tear anything. ALWAYS USE LUBE FOR BUTT SEX! And only do butt sex if the other person agrees.

A few other things; not all girls want to have sex with other girls and have threesomes, not all girls like to be choked and slapped, not all girls love mouth fucking and not all girls cum from only internal stimulation.

But not only do guys always assume things when they watch porn; girls will too. Most guys do not last as long as they do on screen. Trust me, there are a whole of other things going on while on set and it appears they go longer. Trust me I know, my boyfriend does porn and sex at home is so completely different than it is on screen. So ladies don’t assume anything about the men folk either.

In the end I would just like people to realize that everyone is different and wants different things. Please don’t let porn dictate how you are having sex. Sure you can learn new fun tricks and you might find things that you want to try but it is not reality and it is not the only way to do it.

13 comments:

Mr. Vericose said...

Well, I disagree in general as I have with other people (generally females) many times before in the past.

If the women in porn are REAL, then the sex that is had with them and the way they look and the behavior they emulate are equally real. Just because some girls fake it and do it for the camera doesn't mean there aren't plenty of girls out there who don't look that way and fuck that way in their personal life as well.

No offense, but the perspective you are putting across is something that I have laughed at and felt sorry for since I was a teenager.

What it comes down to is: no matter what you want in the bedroom, there is someone out there who is into the same thing. But just like finding anyone else for any other reason, it takes time to find them. Some people are willing to sacrifice some of their bedroom fantasies for a partner they've fallen for, some aren't. I say, if your sexual fantasies are important enough to you - then you better not settle for anyone until you find a partner who will cater to them. If your sexual fantasies aren't that important to you, then I guess you've got nothing to worry about.

The end.

Vodka said...

Um I think you're forgetting that much of porn is ACTING and these people are actors putting on a show like any other performer. @mr v

Lucy Vonne said...

I am not saying everything in porn is wrong and not real, I am just saying it's not for everyone and not what all girls want. The point I am trying to get across is don't assume all girls want it the same way, everyone is different.

Yes a lot of girls do want the same things in movies, I have been one of them. I just don't like how people see it on screen and assume that is how they should always act in the bedroom.

Lag said...

I agree with both Mr. V and Lucy! Everyone is different, in and out of porn, but but porn does tend to follow a formula and forget to mention that anal sex usually doesn't just happen in five seconds with no warmup, or that there's lube going on everything all the time between shots, which can make people think that you don't need it. But Mr. V is right, too: the people in porn are still real people and most of them love what they do!
I think the big thing is this: communication. Make sure your partner is cool at all times, and make sure you're not making him/her do anything he/she doesn't want to, and everyone will be happy!

Lucy Vonne said...

I never said the people in porn aren't real and never said they don't love what they do. Yes the sex is real and that's how the actors like it and a lot of people love their job. But sometimes it is acting and porn in general is a lot of times meant to be fantasy. I am not saying the sex isn't real but not what everyone wants their sex to be in their lives.

S said...

"Sure sometimes if there is a full on bush and no grooming what so ever it can be a bit much. But if there is a good sized landing strip and everything else is smooth what is the big deal?"

How is making that the norm any better than making totally bare the norm? It shouldn't be a big deal even if there is "full on bush" (which happens to be the natural state of affairs, hello). I will, at absolute most, trim. It's not like I'm being somehow "unreasonable" if I don't have a landing strip and everything else bare.

If it's a problem during oral, just spread the lips with your fingers and the problem is pretty much solved! Or just do what women (and men, for most of history) do and just pull a hair out of your mouth once in a while and quite your whining-- it's not gonna kill you!

Anonymous said...

Why do I feel I've read this article before? Maybe I guess it bears repeating.

Anyway, my current girl doesn't even like the style of the dogs, so forget all that porno stuff.

:)

Muse Alex said...

Was in a porn movie once and would say its a stretch to call it acting. It's real. Don't think performers think about the pleasure of sex with a camera crew around them and its pretty difficult to act and be someone else during sex.
Porn is ok for visual stimulus, but imagination and chemistry with your partner are priority in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

All I have to say is YUCK, the stuff you talk about is so crazy, i'm sure your ok with people fucking animals too... Your sick go AWAY

joan said...

to anonymous who said yuck... find something more intelligent to say or just shut the fuck up!

Lily said...

Luce I like this post a lot. You touched on a lot of really great points. If you like your bush, rock it. You don't have to wait for porn to tell you its all right. I also can't help but respond to Mr. V...

The majority of people who write, direct, produce, and most importantly, consume pornography are men. Therefore, within a capitalist system, their preferences are going to be honored in order to maximize profits. Porn is crafted to maximize male visual arousal. It is foolish to assume male visual arousal and female physical arousal and stimulation are synonymous.

Of course there is porn out there that caters to every kind of interest, but what I'm talking about is the mainstream kind. The kind that foolish teenage boy have easy access to. The kind that foolish teenage boys think their "educating" themselves with.

I think what Lucy is getting at, which I wholeheartedly agree with, is that sex is personal and individual. Personally I think that's the best part, learning the unique facets of your partners sexual personality and preferences.

But hey, keep thinking porn is real if it works for you. Let me know how fingering a woman like a jackhammer works out for you.

Anonymous said...

Women of porn. You are in a customer service business. If your customer like no bush then shave it the fuck off or your customer will not pay for you product. Granted 99.9% download porn for free anyway but if you want to continue to live your delusion that you are famous keep your fans happy.

Why do porn stars think they are feminist? Take your double anal, jizz in the face, get paid and be happy.

Sarah Jane Innes said...

have you seen make love not porn ? http://makelovenotporn.com/
It isn't anti porn in fact the creator is pro porn but she was sick of guys trying to cum on her face.